For this milestone, you will build on your writing plan from Module Three while incorporating your instructor’s feedback. Now that you have revised your approach to writing your critical analysis in the Feedback and Revision Reflection assignment, be sure to incorporate your new ideas into this draft. Use the prompt questions below to help develop your draft. You will pull out quotes and paraphrases from your selected reading and write summaries that you will use to support your analysis
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Record: 1
Some Lessons From The Assembly Line.
Braaksma, Andrew
Newsweek. 9/12/2005, Vol. 146 Issue 11, p17-17. 1p. 1 Color
Photograph.
Article
COLLEGE students
INDUSTRIAL workers
APPRENTICES
OCCUPATIONS
COLLEGE environment
UNITED States
Describes the author’s experiences with summer jobs and the
differences with college life. Comparison of the difficulties of working 12-
hour days in a factory with leisurely college life; Lessons learned about
the value of education; How the author applies his factory work lessons
to his college studies; Why the author chooses to work in a factory and
live at home during the summer; Discussion of the value of his work
experiences.
890
0028-9604
18139488
Military & Government Collection
My Turn
Some Lessons From The Assembly Line
Sweating away my summers as a factory worker makes me more than happy to hit the books.
Last June, as I stood behind the bright orange guard door of the machine, listening to the crackling hiss of the
automatic welders, I thought about how different my life had been just a few weeks earlier. Then, I was writing
an essay about French literature to complete my last exam of the spring semester at college. Now I stood in an
automotive plant in southwest Michigan, making subassemblies for a car manufacturer.
I have worked as a temp in the factories surrounding my hometown every summer since I graduated from high
school, but making the transition between school and full-time blue-collar work during the break never gets any
easier. For a student like me who considers any class before noon to be uncivilized, getting to a factory by 6
o’clock each morning, where rows of hulking, spark-showering machines have replaced the lush campus and
cavernous lecture halls of college life, is torture. There my time is spent stamping, cutting, welding, moving or
assembling parts, the rigid work schedules and quotas of the plant making days spent studying and watching
“SportsCenter” seem like a million years ago.
I chose to do this work, rather than bus tables or fold sweatshirts at the Gap, for the overtime pay and because
living at home is infinitely cheaper than living on campus for the summer. My friends who take easier, part-time
jobs never seem to understand why I’m so relieved to be back at school in the fall or that my summer vacation
has been anything but a vacation.
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There are few things as cocksure as a college student who has never been out in the real world, and people
my age always seem to overestimate the value of their time and knowledge. After a particularly exhausting
string of 12-hour days at a plastics factory, I remember being shocked at how small my check seemed. I
couldn’t believe how little I was taking home after all the hours I spent on the sweltering production floor. And
all the classes in the world could not have prepared me for my battles with the machine I ran in the plant, which
would jam whenever I absent-mindedly put in a part backward or upside down.
As frustrating as the work can be, the most stressful thing about blue-collar life is knowing your job could
disappear overnight. Issues like downsizing and overseas relocation had always seemed distant to me until my
co-workers at one factory told me that the unit I was working in would be shut down within six months and
moved to Mexico, where people would work for 60 cents an hour.
Factory life has shown me what my future might have been like had I never gone to college in the first place.
For me, and probably many of my fellow students, higher education always seemed like a foregone conclusion:
I never questioned if I was going to college, just where. No other options ever occurred to me.
After working 12-hour shifts in a factory, the other options have become brutally clear. When I’m back at the
university, skipping classes and turning in lazy re-writes seems like a cop-out after seeing what I would be
doing without school. All the advice and public-service announcements about the value of an education that
used to sound trite now ring true.
These lessons I am learning, however valuable, are always tinged with a sense of guilt. Many people pass
their lives in the places I briefly work, spending 30 years where I spend only two months at a time. When fall
comes around, I get to go back to a sunny and beautiful campus, while work in the factories continues. At
times I feel almost voyeuristic, like a tourist dropping in where other people make their livelihoods. My lessons
about education are learned at the expense of those who weren’t fortunate enough to receive one. “This job
pays well, but it’s hell on the body,” said one co-worker. “Study hard and keep reading,” she added, nodding at
the copy of Jack Kerouac’s “On the Road” I had wedged into the space next to my machine so I could read
discreetly when the line went down.
My experiences will stay with me long after I head back to school and spend my wages on books and beer.
The things that factory work has taught me–how lucky I am to get an education, how to work hard, how easy it
is to lose that work once you have it–are by no means earth-shattering. Everyone has to come to grips with
them at some point. How and when I learned these lessons, however, has inspired me to make the most of my
college years before I enter the real world for good. Until then, the summer months I spend in the factories will
be long, tiring and every bit as educational as a French-lit class.
PHOTO (COLOR): Is that all? After an exhausting string of 12-hour days, I remember being shocked at how
small my check seemed
~~~~~~~~
By Andrew Braaksma
Braaksma, a junior at the University of Michigan, wrote the winning essay in our “Back To School” contest.
Copyright of Newsweek is the property of Newsweek LLC and its content may not be copied or emailed to
multiple sites or posted to a listserv without the copyright holder’s express written permission. However, users
may print, download, or email articles for individual use.
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ENG 122 Summative Assessment Part Two Milestone One Guidelines and Rubric
First Draft of Critical Analysis Essay
Overview: The ability to communicate a message through writing is essential in any career. Effective writing shapes and informs the opinions of its readers. The
writing process can be intimidating; however, the more you work with it, the more comfortable the process becomes.
Prompt: For this milestone, you will build on your writing plan from Module Three while incorporating your instructor’s feedback. Now that you have revised
your approach to writing your critical analysis essay in the Feedback and Revision Reflection assignment, be sure to incorporate your new ideas into this draft.
Use the prompt questions below to help develop your draft. You will pull out quotes and paraphrases from your selected reading and write summaries that you
will use to support your analysis.
When you are done responding to the prompts below, you will have the first draft of your critical analysis essay. In Module Six, you will complete a revision
activity to further improve this draft.
Specifically, the following critical elements must be addressed:
I. Introduction: The introduction of your essay is where readers will learn what your essay is about. They will also learn about the claim that you plan to
support in your essay. Introductions give readers a sample of what is to come. Don’t forget to review your writing plan to make sure you are briefly
covering all of the key points you identified. If your claim and key points have changed since the writing plan, that is okay! Seek feedback on your new
ideas from your instructor or the SNHU Online Writing Center.
A. Provide an overview of the selected reading you have analyzed, briefly describing main points and your reaction to the author’s claim.
B. State your evaluation of the author’s claim that you will support in your essay. This statement will give direction to your essay and should be
well thought out.
II. Body: The body of your essay is your opportunity to support your evaluation of the author’s argument. Make sure your thoughts and evidence are clear
and easy to read and understand.
A. Be sure to write paragraphs that are focused, clearly state their intent, and move logically from one to the other, building the analysis as the
essay progresses.
B. Your body paragraphs should support your analysis by combining thoughts and ideas with evidence from the selected reading. There is no such
thing as a right or wrong evaluation; the keys are how your analysis is supported and the quality of the evidence used.
III. Conclusion: Think of the conclusion paragraph as a review of your analysis. Use this section to restate your evaluation and remind readers of your
supporting evidence. Think of this as your last chance to prove your point. You will also reflect upon your experiences with the writing process.
A. Write an overview of your analysis, summarize your key points from the selected reading, and describe how they helped you form your analysis.
B. Explain the lessons you have learned about critical thinking, analysis, and revision and how they can be applied to future writing activities in
your academic or professional life.
Rubric
Guidelines for Submission: The draft of your analysis essay should be 1–2 pages in length. Save your work in a Microsoft Word document with double spacing,
12-point Times New Roman font, and one-inch margins. Then, check your writing for errors. Once you have proofread your document, submit it via the
Summative Assessment Part Two Milestone One: First Draft of Critical Analysis Essay link in Brightspace.
Critical Elements Proficient (100%) Needs Improvement (75%) Not Evident (0%) Value
Introduction: Overview Provides an overview of the work being
analyzed
Provides an overview of the work being
analyzed, but it contains issues
regarding clarity
Does not provide an overview of the
work being analyzed
15
Introduction: Claim States an evaluation that covers the
analysis that will be explained
throughout the essay
States an evaluation, but it contains
issues related to clarity or relevancy
Does not state an evaluation 15
Body: Intent Writes multiple paragraphs that are
focused, clearly state their intent, and
build the analysis
Writes multiple paragraphs, but writing
does not build the analysis
Does not write multiple paragraphs 15
Body: Body Paragraphs Supports analysis with body paragraphs
that combine thoughts and ideas with
evidence
Supports analysis with body
paragraphs, but they do not combine
thoughts and ideas with evidence
Does not support analysis through body
paragraphs
20
Conclusion: Overview Reviews analysis and key supporting
points of essay
Reviews analysis and key supporting
points, but review contains issues
regarding alignment to the evaluation
Does not review analysis 15
Conclusion: Lessons
Learned
Explains what was learned about critical
thinking, analysis, and revision and how
they can be applied to future writing
activities in one’s academic or
professional life
Explains what was learned about critical
thinking, analysis, and revision and how
they can be applied to future writing
activities in one’s academic or
professional life, but explanation is
unclear or cursory
Does not explain what was learned
about critical thinking, analysis, and
revision for future writing activities in
one’s academic or professional life
15
Articulation of Response Submission has no major errors related
to citations, grammar, spelling, syntax,
or organization
Submission has major errors related to
citations, grammar, spelling, syntax, or
organization that negatively impact
readability and articulation of main
ideas
Submission has critical errors related to
citations, grammar, spelling, syntax, or
organization that prevent
understanding of ideas
5
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